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brendalaI visited my awesome Grandmother for a few days last week. One night she wanted to check out the new Betty White sitcom on TV Land called Hot in Cleveland (Bubbie is a HUGE Betty White fan). We watched it together and it was one of the WORST sitcoms (nay, worst TV shows) we have ever seen!
EPISODE SUMMARY:
Hot in Cleveland is about a trio of 40 or 50-something women who work in the entertainment industry and live in a house together in Cleveland with Betty White. I didn't care enough about the characters to remember their names or look them up online, so I'll just use my own substitutes. The main characters are named "Tall-Skank", "Valerie Bertinelli", "Daphne-From-Frasier" ("Daphne" for short), and "Betty White".
The basic plot of the episode we watched involved Tall-Skank wanting to go to a music industry party and throw a drink in the face of her ex-boyfriend (a successful, aging rock star) to get back at him for treating her like a sex toy and dumping her on the side of the road in the 80s. Valerie Bertinelli goes to the party because she wants to meet her favorite old school Grrl Power singer. Daphne tags along for....something to do, I suppose. And Betty White also tags along just for something to do despite being completely out of place there.
Anyway, at the party, Valerie Bertinelli runs up to her friends in a panic because her meeting with her Grrl Power idol didn't go well. Valerie says that she tripped, accidentally fell face first into her idol's cleavage, and ended up motor-boating said idol while trying to dislodge her earring from the singer's shirt. Now she fears that her idol thinks she's a creepy stalker pervert. Which is a problem that could have been easily rectified if she had just apologized like a grown up instead of running off like a lunatic. But this is a sitcom; so I suppose wacky misunderstandings that could be easily cleared up if the characters acted like mature adults and just talked to each other is par for the course. Valerie Bertinelli eventually decides to leave an apology note with the bartender because she's too embarrassed to approach her idol directly.
In response to Valerie's fear of being viewed as a stalker. Daphne tries to make her feel better by saying that she has tons of restraining orders against her and that "You'd be surprised what you can do from 300 feet away". Earlier in the episode, Daphne offers equally unhinged advice to Tall-Skank about ways she could get back at her ex that are more effective/damaging than tossing vodka in his face. I think the writers intended for Daphne's insanity to be charming, quirky, and/or funny. But it just makes me think that it's only a matter of time before she either pulls a "Single White Female" on her roommates or ends up like the psycho in Fatal Attraction. That kind of plot twist might actually make Hot In Cleveland a lot of fun to watch. But I don't think the people who write this show are that clever.
Tall-Skank eventually finds her old boyfriend. But she suddenly remembers how sexy his "bad boy" persona was before she can chuck her large, heavy drink into his face. So, instead of confronting Mr. Aging Rockstar for being a misogynist prick back in the day and leaving her to die on the side of the road, she follows him back to his hotel room after he sweet talks her for about 10 seconds. I wish I was making that up. -_-
Meanwhile, Betty White wanders around the party spitting out lame one-liners like an escaped Alzheimer's patient. Most of the one-liners are sexual in nature (there's one scene where she hits on a huge Black bouncer guy and asks if "the rumors about Black men are true?") because filthy things coming out of Betty White's mouth is totally not becoming an old, stale joke, right? Betty White barely interacts with the other main characters nor does she contribute to the plot(s) in any way. She's just there to rattle off bad jokes and waste her talent.
The morning after the party, Tall-Skank is sitting at home with her roommates and she's sad because her Rockstar ex-boyfriend is no longer a mysogynist douchebag (and therefore he's no longer desirable because his "bad boy" charm is gone). She complains, "He was so nice and romantic and considerate in bed. It made the sex TERRIBLE boo hoo!". Because, we all know that women can only be turned on by men who treat them like shit and are selfish in bed! Thanks for adding fuel to that loathsome stereotype Hot In Cleveland writers!
After Tall-Skank is done lamenting the fact that her ex didn't feed her roofies, slap her around in the hotel room, and leave her in a ditch by the side of the road; Valerie Bertinelli's Grrl Power singer idol shows up at the door. Miss Grrl Power tells Valerie that her apology note was sweet and that she's flattered her music got Valerie through her angsty teen years. Then Miss Grrl Power proceeds to shove her tongue down Valerie's throat without any warning or permission ('cuz that's what empowered feminist lesbians do!!). Apparently, Miss Grrl Power assumed the motor-boating and the note were just Valerie's clumsy attempts to hit on her. Valerie says, "OMG, I'm not gay (not that there's anything wrong with that!). But I never knew YOU were gay!". Miss Grrl Power responds, "You never figured it out from my song 'Eat My Hot Muffin' or '[insert horrible lesbian sex pun here]'!?". Valerie responds by saying she had no idea. I guess this is supposed to establish Valerie as naive and/or innocent; but it just makes her look like a dumbass. If Valerie works in the entertainment industry and knows what "motor-boating" is, it doesn't make sense that she couldn't figure out the painfully obvious single-entendres in her favorite singer's songs.
This show wasn't totally without entertainment value. Bubbie and I had a blast mocking it...
Grandma: I don't get this show? Is it just me?
Me: No, your mind isn't going. I thought it was awful, too.
Grandma: Thank goodness, I was afraid it was just me! There was no plot! And Betty White didn't do anything. She was like set decoration. They're just trying to cash in on her popularity!
Me: And these characters are awful. They're annoying and none of the jokes they tell are funny.
Grandma: This show isn't going to last more than one season. I don't see how anyone could enjoy it. Sitcoms today are so awful.
So, take it from me and grandma, this show isn't worth your time! It isn't "so bad it's funny". It's "so bad it hurts to look at it". And as much as I feel for the poor actresses who are just trying to get a job that involves actual acting instead of humiliating themselves in some degrading reality show; Hot in Cleveland is a terrible show and it deserves to rot one-season limbo with all the other shows that died after one season.
EPISODE SUMMARY:
Hot in Cleveland is about a trio of 40 or 50-something women who work in the entertainment industry and live in a house together in Cleveland with Betty White. I didn't care enough about the characters to remember their names or look them up online, so I'll just use my own substitutes. The main characters are named "Tall-Skank", "Valerie Bertinelli", "Daphne-From-Frasier" ("Daphne" for short), and "Betty White".
The basic plot of the episode we watched involved Tall-Skank wanting to go to a music industry party and throw a drink in the face of her ex-boyfriend (a successful, aging rock star) to get back at him for treating her like a sex toy and dumping her on the side of the road in the 80s. Valerie Bertinelli goes to the party because she wants to meet her favorite old school Grrl Power singer. Daphne tags along for....something to do, I suppose. And Betty White also tags along just for something to do despite being completely out of place there.
Anyway, at the party, Valerie Bertinelli runs up to her friends in a panic because her meeting with her Grrl Power idol didn't go well. Valerie says that she tripped, accidentally fell face first into her idol's cleavage, and ended up motor-boating said idol while trying to dislodge her earring from the singer's shirt. Now she fears that her idol thinks she's a creepy stalker pervert. Which is a problem that could have been easily rectified if she had just apologized like a grown up instead of running off like a lunatic. But this is a sitcom; so I suppose wacky misunderstandings that could be easily cleared up if the characters acted like mature adults and just talked to each other is par for the course. Valerie Bertinelli eventually decides to leave an apology note with the bartender because she's too embarrassed to approach her idol directly.
In response to Valerie's fear of being viewed as a stalker. Daphne tries to make her feel better by saying that she has tons of restraining orders against her and that "You'd be surprised what you can do from 300 feet away". Earlier in the episode, Daphne offers equally unhinged advice to Tall-Skank about ways she could get back at her ex that are more effective/damaging than tossing vodka in his face. I think the writers intended for Daphne's insanity to be charming, quirky, and/or funny. But it just makes me think that it's only a matter of time before she either pulls a "Single White Female" on her roommates or ends up like the psycho in Fatal Attraction. That kind of plot twist might actually make Hot In Cleveland a lot of fun to watch. But I don't think the people who write this show are that clever.
Tall-Skank eventually finds her old boyfriend. But she suddenly remembers how sexy his "bad boy" persona was before she can chuck her large, heavy drink into his face. So, instead of confronting Mr. Aging Rockstar for being a misogynist prick back in the day and leaving her to die on the side of the road, she follows him back to his hotel room after he sweet talks her for about 10 seconds. I wish I was making that up. -_-
Meanwhile, Betty White wanders around the party spitting out lame one-liners like an escaped Alzheimer's patient. Most of the one-liners are sexual in nature (there's one scene where she hits on a huge Black bouncer guy and asks if "the rumors about Black men are true?") because filthy things coming out of Betty White's mouth is totally not becoming an old, stale joke, right? Betty White barely interacts with the other main characters nor does she contribute to the plot(s) in any way. She's just there to rattle off bad jokes and waste her talent.
The morning after the party, Tall-Skank is sitting at home with her roommates and she's sad because her Rockstar ex-boyfriend is no longer a mysogynist douchebag (and therefore he's no longer desirable because his "bad boy" charm is gone). She complains, "He was so nice and romantic and considerate in bed. It made the sex TERRIBLE boo hoo!". Because, we all know that women can only be turned on by men who treat them like shit and are selfish in bed! Thanks for adding fuel to that loathsome stereotype Hot In Cleveland writers!
After Tall-Skank is done lamenting the fact that her ex didn't feed her roofies, slap her around in the hotel room, and leave her in a ditch by the side of the road; Valerie Bertinelli's Grrl Power singer idol shows up at the door. Miss Grrl Power tells Valerie that her apology note was sweet and that she's flattered her music got Valerie through her angsty teen years. Then Miss Grrl Power proceeds to shove her tongue down Valerie's throat without any warning or permission ('cuz that's what empowered feminist lesbians do!!). Apparently, Miss Grrl Power assumed the motor-boating and the note were just Valerie's clumsy attempts to hit on her. Valerie says, "OMG, I'm not gay (not that there's anything wrong with that!). But I never knew YOU were gay!". Miss Grrl Power responds, "You never figured it out from my song 'Eat My Hot Muffin' or '[insert horrible lesbian sex pun here]'!?". Valerie responds by saying she had no idea. I guess this is supposed to establish Valerie as naive and/or innocent; but it just makes her look like a dumbass. If Valerie works in the entertainment industry and knows what "motor-boating" is, it doesn't make sense that she couldn't figure out the painfully obvious single-entendres in her favorite singer's songs.
This show wasn't totally without entertainment value. Bubbie and I had a blast mocking it...
Grandma: I don't get this show? Is it just me?
Me: No, your mind isn't going. I thought it was awful, too.
Grandma: Thank goodness, I was afraid it was just me! There was no plot! And Betty White didn't do anything. She was like set decoration. They're just trying to cash in on her popularity!
Me: And these characters are awful. They're annoying and none of the jokes they tell are funny.
Grandma: This show isn't going to last more than one season. I don't see how anyone could enjoy it. Sitcoms today are so awful.
So, take it from me and grandma, this show isn't worth your time! It isn't "so bad it's funny". It's "so bad it hurts to look at it". And as much as I feel for the poor actresses who are just trying to get a job that involves actual acting instead of humiliating themselves in some degrading reality show; Hot in Cleveland is a terrible show and it deserves to rot one-season limbo with all the other shows that died after one season.
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no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 07:07 am (UTC)We watched another episode that was much more enjoyable, but still falls victim to the sitcom trap of being predictable.
I don't know any of their names either, but 'Tall-skank' as you call her actually voiced Pacha's wife in Disney's the Emperor's New Groove, so I keep thinking of that. 'Daphne' has always been enjoyable to me since the Frasier days (I also liked her as Mrs. Ladybug in the movie version of James and the Giant Peach), and Betty White has always been great fun. I've no idea who the last actress is.
It would be nice if they'd take a page from the early seasons of Frasier and make a more witty show. As it is, it seems to be trying to appeal to those Desperate Housewives fans, but I hope it's not as oddly stupid as that one.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 07:59 am (UTC)Since you said another episode is better; I might give this show another chance if I happen to catch it again. It's just that this episode left a REALLY bad taste in my mouth. And it didn't help that I had to see Grandma get disappointed, too.
I don't know any of their names either, but 'Tall-skank' as you call her actually voiced Pacha's wife in Disney's the Emperor's New Groove, so I keep thinking of that. 'Daphne' has always been enjoyable to me since the Frasier days (I also liked her as Mrs. Ladybug in the movie version of James and the Giant Peach), and Betty White has always been great fun. I've no idea who the last actress is.
Wendy Malik (I finally got off my butt and looked up her name) is one of those actresses that I always recognize but I'm not always sure why I recognize her. LOL
I agree that Daphne and Betty White are always awesome. And Valerie Bertinelli's heyday was before our time (I only recognize her because I remember her Jenny Craig commercials).
It would be nice if they'd take a page from the early seasons of Frasier and make a more witty show. As it is, it seems to be trying to appeal to those Desperate Housewives fans, but I hope it's not as oddly stupid as that one.
I got the impression that they were trying to combine The Golden Girls with Sex in the City and it didn't quite mix.
This show might have a chance if it tried doing it's own thing instead of just being a more racy version of The Golden Girls.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 01:44 pm (UTC)I do miss the old 80's/90's sitcoms and this isn't one of them but it was cool. And such a change from stupid reality telly. Sitcoms now are on weird ground. Trying to fit into the "new world", so to speak.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 02:39 pm (UTC)Ah, yes. God forbid sitcom focus on real issues. Rather focus on issues caused by insecurity and slapstick.
"He was so nice and romantic and considerate in bed. It made the sex TERRIBLE boo hoo!"
Yeah, because nobody can get off if no one is c**k-slappingt them accross the face. The worse part is, this is probably true for some women.
Then Miss Grrl Power proceeds to shove her tongue down Valerie's throat without any warning or permission ('cuz that's what empowered feminist lesbians do!!).
..............Of course. And let's not forget bisexuals, who are darn rude like that to both genders. Those sexually inhibited rascals!
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 07:28 am (UTC)Sitcoms can be cliche and/or slapstick and still be fun to watch as long as the characters are likable and the writing is strong (see 'I Love Lucy' and 'Golden Girls'). Sadly, this show didn't have any of that. Not even Betty White was funny or likable in this episode! The writing was so bad it sucked the charm right out of her!! O_o
Yeah, because nobody can get off if no one is c**k-slappingt them accross the face. The worse part is, this is probably true for some women.
I don't know about you, but I won't even give a man the time of day unless he punches me in the gut a few times and calls me fat. Men who treat me like a person are so boring!
/end sarcasm
Sadly, some women really do have a disturbing habit of dating horrible, abusive men almost exclusively. A good show could milk that kind of storyline for either drama or dark comedy. But this show didn't do anything with it other than make Tall-Skank out to be a deranged idiot.
............Of course. And let's not forget bisexuals, who are darn rude like that to both genders. Those sexually inhibited rascals!
Oh no! I forgot about the bisexuals! I better lock up my Strangers in Paradise books before Katchoo gets out and destroys my innocence!! LOL
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 01:36 pm (UTC)Hey, have you read Terry Moore's new series Echo?
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 09:13 pm (UTC)I'm loving the story of Echo so far. The sci-fi/conspiracy plot is VERY different from the relationship melodrama in SIP; but he has pulled it off flawlessly so far.
I really hope that the Echo movie actually gets made instead of sitting in development hell (I know Moore sold the movie rights to Echo, but I don't know if anything came of it). I think it would make a great thriller (provided the right people were involved in the creative process).
no subject
Date: 2010-07-17 02:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-17 02:39 am (UTC)I really hope Moore gets to keep creative control. I'd hate to see Echo get the Last Airbender treatment. >_<
At the same panel, he also talked about how HBO wanted to make a SIP animated series back in the late 90s. He ended up pulling the plug on that deal because HBO wanted to make the show "edgy and dark" by playing up the violence and the "OMG hot lesbians" angle. -_-
That story really made me sad because seeing Moore's art animated would have been a treat. He has said that he's thought about getting an indie production to do a SIP movie; but finding an actress who could pull off Katchoo would be tough (and covering SIPs plot in one movie would be near impossible).
no subject
Date: 2010-07-18 05:14 am (UTC)I don't think I would like to see his work animated. It would require Disney-level animation to do the quality of the drawings justice, and very little people would invest that much for an adult film. I say, go the live action route, but maybe animate certain sequences, like the dreams.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-18 11:12 pm (UTC)If it were up to me, I'd choose the High School story for a SIP movie. It's short and self-contained; yet it still tells the audience a lot about Katchoo and Francine and leaves them wanting to see more of them.
The High School book was also the first SIP story I ever read (my high school's library had it). So I have a special fondness for it.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-19 01:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-19 06:30 pm (UTC)If hell froze over and Moore got to adapt SIP into a TV show (live action or animated), I think it would be a great opportunity for him to eliminate some of the glaring inconsistencies and plot holes (mainly the 10 year split and the the unsolved ambulance bomber mystery) that happened as a result of him making up SIP's story as he went along.
Now that I think about it, the Xena tribute should be the SIP movie! C'mon, you KNOW you want to see it happen!! ~_^